Sunday, March 18, 2012

The Monsters In My Closet

I fear death.  I fear the day I'm lying on the ground, saying my last words, taking my last breath.  Or is that just in the movies?  I fear my life will turn out like the movies.  That my life is just a plot intended to be Someones brief Entertainment, only to have a "happy" end.  I'm afraid that all my hard work will amount to nothing.  That after all I've done for You, I'll only be called a friend.  I'm afraid that there Is an end.  That one day I will lose all I have.  I'm afraid of falling backwards, hands groping, but nothing to grab.  I'm afraid that if I give my heart away, I'll get stabbed. . . again.  I fear knowledge.  I fear knowing I wasn't good enough to get it right.  I fear my writing will be light.  I want my writing to be heavy.  I want my writing to leave an impression on another life.  I'm afraid of getting what I want.  Afraid that if I get everything I want, I will forget how to dream.  And I don't want to forget.  Not about You.

2 comments:

  1. "I fear my writing will be light." I have this same fear. I wish more people had this same fear. Because fear sometimes is a great motivator for success. (did I just say that? I don't even know what that means?)

    Anyway. That was one of the realest things I've read this morning.

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  2. Great job. I loved this, as always. But I do want to say one thing - when you are falling backwards, hands groping with nothing to grab, I hope I can be the friend that is there to reach forward and grab you.

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